biblemunger

provocative text replacement in famous literature

The Holy Fucking Scriptures

Find some text in the Bible and replace it with other text.

What the fuck is this?

How the fuck do I use this?

  • Note that it will even search/replace just a part of a word. For instance, in the "servant" ⇒ "uber driver" search, note that some verses now refer to "menuber drivers and maiduber drivers" (from menservants and maidservants)
  • However, it does search/replace numbers and punctuation, not just letters, so if the above behavior is undesirable, surround your search and your replacement with spaces. For example, " servant " ⇒ " uber driver " will only find instances of "servant" when it's surrounded by spaces. (This also means that it will not find results of "servant" when followed by punctuation.)
  • One final thing to note: because it's so strict, it currently is case sensitive, such that LORD ⇒ kickstarter backer will find completely different results than lord ⇒ kickstarter backer, which will find completely different results than Lord ⇒ kickstarter backer. This means that, currently, an uncapitalized search term will never match a word that begins a sentence.

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hearts ⇒ feels

Genesis 18:5And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your feels; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
Exodus 14:17And I, behold, I will harden the feels of the Egyptians, and they shall follow them: and I will get me honour upon Pharaoh, and upon all his host, upon his chariots, and upon his horsemen.
Exodus 31:6And I, behold, I have given with him Aholiab, the son of Ahisamach, of the tribe of Dan: and in the feels of all that are wise hearted I have put wisdom, that they may make all that I have commanded thee;
Leviticus 26:36And upon them that are left alive of you I will send a faintness into their feels in the lands of their enemies; and the sound of a shaken leaf shall chase them; and they shall flee, as fleeing from a sword; and they shall fall when none pursueth.
Leviticus 26:41And that I also have walked contrary unto them, and have brought them into the land of their enemies; if then their uncircumcised feels be humbled, and they then accept of the punishment of their iniquity:
Deuteronomy 20:3And shall say unto them, Hear, O Israel, ye approach this day unto battle against your enemies: let not your feels faint, fear not, and do not tremble, neither be ye terrified because of them;
Deuteronomy 32:46And he said unto them, Set your feels unto all the words which I testify among you this day, which ye shall command your children to observe to do, all the words of this law.
Joshua 2:11And as soon as we had heard these things, our feels did melt, neither did there remain any more courage in any man, because of you: for the LORD your God, he is God in heaven above, and in earth beneath.
Joshua 7:5And the men of Ai smote of them about thirty and six men: for they chased them from before the gate even unto Shebarim, and smote them in the going down: wherefore the feels of the people melted, and became as water.
Joshua 11:20For it was of the LORD to harden their feels, that they should come against Israel in battle, that he might destroy them utterly, and that they might have no favour, but that he might destroy them, as the LORD commanded Moses.
Joshua 23:14And, behold, this day I am going the way of all the earth: and ye know in all your feels and in all your souls, that not one thing hath failed of all the good things which the LORD your God spake concerning you; all are come to pass unto you, and not one thing hath failed thereof.
Judges 9:3And his mother's brethren spake of him in the ears of all the men of Shechem all these words: and their feels inclined to follow Abimelech; for they said, He is our brother.
Judges 16:25And it came to pass, when their feels were merry, that they said, Call for Samson, that he may make us sport. And they called for Samson out of the prison house; and he made them sport: and they set him between the pillars.
Judges 19:22Now as they were making their feels merry, behold, the men of the city, certain sons of Belial, beset the house round about, and beat at the door, and spake to the master of the house, the old man, saying, Bring forth the man that came into thine house, that we may know him.
1 Samuel 6:6Wherefore then do ye harden your feels, as the Egyptians and Pharaoh hardened their feels? when he had wrought wonderfully among them, did they not let the people go, and they departed?
1 Samuel 7:3And Samuel spake unto all the house of Israel, saying, If ye do return unto the LORD with all your feels, then put away the strange gods and Ashtaroth from among you, and prepare your feels unto the LORD, and serve him only: and he will deliver you out of the hand of the Philistines.
1 Samuel 10:26And Saul also went home to Gibeah; and there went with him a band of men, whose feels God had touched.
2 Samuel 15:6And on this manner did Absalom to all Israel that came to the king for judgment: so Absalom stole the feels of the men of Israel.
2 Samuel 15:13And there came a messenger to David, saying, The feels of the men of Israel are after Absalom.
1 Kings 8:39Then hear thou in heaven thy dwelling place, and forgive, and do, and give to every man according to his ways, whose heart thou knowest; (for thou, even thou only, knowest the feels of all the children of men;)
1 Kings 8:58That he may incline our feels unto him, to walk in all his ways, and to keep his commandments, and his statutes, and his judgments, which he commanded our fathers.
1 Chronicles 28:9And thou, Solomon my son, know thou the God of thy father, and serve him with a perfect heart and with a willing mind: for the LORD searcheth all feels, and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts: if thou seek him, he will be found of thee; but if thou forsake him, he will cast thee off for ever.
2 Chronicles 6:14And said, O LORD God of Israel, there is no God like thee in the heaven, nor in the earth; which keepest covenant, and shewest mercy unto thy servants, that walk before thee with all their feels:
2 Chronicles 6:30Then hear thou from heaven thy dwelling place, and forgive, and render unto every man according unto all his ways, whose heart thou knowest; (for thou only knowest the feels of the children of men:)
2 Chronicles 11:16And after them out of all the tribes of Israel such as set their feels to seek the LORD God of Israel came to Jerusalem, to sacrifice unto the LORD God of their fathers.
2 Chronicles 20:33Howbeit the high places were not taken away: for as yet the people had not prepared their feels unto the God of their fathers.
Job 1:5And it was so, when the days of their feasting were gone about, that Job sent and sanctified them, and rose up early in the morning, and offered burnt offerings according to the number of them all: for Job said, It may be that my sons have sinned, and cursed God in their feels. Thus did Job continually.
Psalm 7:9Oh let the wickedness of the wicked come to an end; but establish the just: for the righteous God trieth the feels and reins.
Psalm 28:3Draw me not away with the wicked, and with the workers of iniquity, which speak peace to their neighbours, but mischief is in their feels.
Psalm 33:15He fashioneth their feels alike; he considereth all their works.
Psalm 35:25Let them not say in their feels, Ah, so would we have it: let them not say, We have swallowed him up.
Psalm 74:8They said in their feels, Let us destroy them together: they have burned up all the synagogues of God in the land.
Psalm 81:12So I gave them up unto their own feels' lust: and they walked in their own counsels.
Psalm 90:12So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our feels unto wisdom.
Psalm 125:4Do good, O LORD, unto those that be good, and to them that are upright in their feels.
Proverbs 15:11Hell and destruction are before the LORD: how much more then the feels of the children of men?
Proverbs 17:3The fining pot is for silver, and the furnace for gold: but the LORD trieth the feels.
Proverbs 21:2Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the feels.
Proverbs 31:6Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy feels.
Isaiah 44:18They have not known nor understood: for he hath shut their eyes, that they cannot see; and their feels, that they cannot understand.
Jeremiah 31:33But this shall be the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel; After those days, saith the LORD, I will put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their feels; and will be their God, and they shall be my people.
Jeremiah 32:40And I will make an everlasting covenant with them, that I will not turn away from them, to do them good; but I will put my fear in their feels, that they shall not depart from me.
Jeremiah 42:20For ye dissembled in your feels, when ye sent me unto the LORD your God, saying, Pray for us unto the LORD our God; and according unto all that the LORD our God shall say, so declare unto us, and we will do it.
Jeremiah 48:41Kerioth is taken, and the strong holds are surprised, and the mighty men's feels in Moab at that day shall be as the heart of a woman in her pangs.
Ezekiel 13:2Son of man, prophesy against the prophets of Israel that prophesy, and say thou unto them that prophesy out of their own feels, Hear ye the word of the LORD;
Ezekiel 32:9I will also vex the feels of many people, when I shall bring thy destruction among the nations, into the countries which thou hast not known.
Daniel 11:27And both these kings' feels shall be to do mischief, and they shall speak lies at one table; but it shall not prosper: for yet the end shall be at the time appointed.
Hosea 7:2And they consider not in their feels that I remember all their wickedness: now their own doings have beset them about; they are before my face.
Zechariah 7:12Yea, they made their feels as an adamant stone, lest they should hear the law, and the words which the LORD of hosts hath sent in his spirit by the former prophets: therefore came a great wrath from the LORD of hosts.
Zechariah 8:17And let none of you imagine evil in your feels against his neighbour; and love no false oath: for all these are things that I hate, saith the LORD.
Matthew 9:4And Jesus knowing their thoughts said, Wherefore think ye evil in your feels?
Matthew 18:35So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your feels forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Matthew 19:8He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your feels suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
Mark 2:6But there were certain of the scribes sitting there, and reasoning in their feels,
Mark 2:8And immediately when Jesus perceived in his spirit that they so reasoned within themselves, he said unto them, Why reason ye these things in your feels?
Mark 3:5And when he had looked round about on them with anger, being grieved for the hardness of their feels, he saith unto the man, Stretch forth thine hand. And he stretched it out: and his hand was restored whole as the other.
Mark 4:15And these are they by the way side, where the word is sown; but when they have heard, Satan cometh immediately, and taketh away the word that was sown in their feels.
Luke 1:17And he shall go before him in the spirit and power of Elias, to turn the feels of the fathers to the children, and the disobedient to the wisdom of the just; to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.
Luke 1:51He hath shewed strength with his arm; he hath scattered the proud in the imagination of their feels.
Luke 1:66And all they that heard them laid them up in their feels, saying, What manner of child shall this be! And the hand of the Lord was with him.
Luke 2:35Yea, a sword shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many feels may be revealed.
Luke 3:15And as the people were in expectation, and all men mused in their feels of John, whether he were the Christ, or not;
Luke 5:22But when Jesus perceived their thoughts, he answering said unto them, What reason ye in your feels?
Luke 8:12Those by the way side are they that hear; then cometh the devil, and taketh away the word out of their feels, lest they should believe and be saved.
Luke 16:15And he said unto them, Ye are they which justify yourselves before men; but God knoweth your feels: for that which is highly esteemed among men is abomination in the sight of God.
Luke 21:14Settle it therefore in your feels, not to meditate before what ye shall answer:
Luke 21:26Men's feels failing them for fear, and for looking after those things which are coming on the earth: for the powers of heaven shall be shaken.
Luke 21:34And take heed to yourselves, lest at any time your feels be overcharged with surfeiting, and drunkenness, and cares of this life, and so that day come upon you unawares.
Luke 24:38And he said unto them, Why are ye troubled? and why do thoughts arise in your feels?
Acts 1:24And they prayed, and said, Thou, Lord, which knowest the feels of all men, shew whether of these two thou hast chosen,
Acts 7:39To whom our fathers would not obey, but thrust him from them, and in their feels turned back again into Egypt,
Acts 14:17Nevertheless he left not himself without witness, in that he did good, and gave us rain from heaven, and fruitful seasons, filling our feels with food and gladness.
Acts 15:8And God, which knoweth the feels, bare them witness, giving them the Holy Ghost, even as he did unto us;
Acts 15:9And put no difference between us and them, purifying their feels by faith.
Romans 1:24Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own feels, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves:
Romans 2:15Which shew the work of the law written in their feels, their conscience also bearing witness, and their thoughts the mean while accusing or else excusing one another;)
Romans 5:5And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our feels by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.
Romans 8:27And he that searcheth the feels knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.
Romans 16:18For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the feels of the simple.
1 Corinthians 4:5Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the feels: and then shall every man have praise of God.
2 Corinthians 1:22Who hath also sealed us, and given the earnest of the Spirit in our feels.
2 Corinthians 3:2Ye are our epistle written in our feels, known and read of all men:
2 Corinthians 4:6For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our feels, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.
2 Corinthians 7:3I speak not this to condemn you: for I have said before, that ye are in our feels to die and live with you.
Galatians 4:6And because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your feels, crying, Abba, Father.
Ephesians 3:17That Christ may dwell in your feels by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,
Ephesians 6:22Whom I have sent unto you for the same purpose, that ye might know our affairs, and that he might comfort your feels.
Philippians 4:7And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your feels and minds through Christ Jesus.
Colossians 2:2That their feels might be comforted, being knit together in love, and unto all riches of the full assurance of understanding, to the acknowledgement of the mystery of God, and of the Father, and of Christ;
Colossians 3:15And let the peace of God rule in your feels, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.
Colossians 3:16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your feels to the Lord.
Colossians 4:8Whom I have sent unto you for the same purpose, that he might know your estate, and comfort your feels;
1 Thessalonians 2:4But as we were allowed of God to be put in trust with the gospel, even so we speak; not as pleasing men, but God, which trieth our feels.
1 Thessalonians 3:13To the end he may stablish your feels unblameable in holiness before God, even our Father, at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ with all his saints.
2 Thessalonians 2:17Comfort your feels, and stablish you in every good word and work.
2 Thessalonians 3:5And the Lord direct your feels into the love of God, and into the patient waiting for Christ.
Hebrews 3:8Harden not your feels, as in the provocation, in the day of temptation in the wilderness:
Hebrews 3:15While it is said, To day if ye will hear his voice, harden not your feels, as in the provocation.
Hebrews 4:7Again, he limiteth a certain day, saying in David, To day, after so long a time; as it is said, To day if ye will hear his voice, harden not your feels.
Hebrews 8:10For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, saith the Lord; I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their feels: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people:
Hebrews 10:16This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord, I will put my laws into their feels, and in their minds will I write them;
Hebrews 10:22Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our feels sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.
James 3:14But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your feels, glory not, and lie not against the truth.
James 4:8Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your feels, ye double minded.
James 5:5Ye have lived in pleasure on the earth, and been wanton; ye have nourished your feels, as in a day of slaughter.
James 5:8Be ye also patient; stablish your feels: for the coming of the Lord draweth nigh.
1 Peter 3:15But sanctify the Lord God in your feels: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:
2 Peter 1:19We have also a more sure word of prophecy; whereunto ye do well that ye take heed, as unto a light that shineth in a dark place, until the day dawn, and the day star arise in your feels:
1 John 3:19And hereby we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our feels before him.
Revelation 2:23And I will kill her children with death; and all the churches shall know that I am he which searcheth the reins and feels: and I will give unto every one of you according to your works.
Revelation 17:17For God hath put in their feels to fulfil his will, and to agree, and give their kingdom unto the beast, until the words of God shall be fulfilled.